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Rescued from Norway

You may have read in the news that the Norwegians recently attempted to trap me by paying the Icelanders to burn parts of their country in order to spread a cloud of airborne debris across Europe, thus closing all the airports. It took me a while to get to the bottom of it, but eventually [...]

John’s Birthday

Wishing you a very happy 70th Birthday, John! Love from The Minions.

Click here to see your Twitter birthday wishes from Twitter followers.
image:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/robbrooks/ / CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

Birthday Suicide Poll

Some of you have been enjoying banter with me on Twitter.
Never one to be overly concerned about convention or even taste, I recently mentioned that I was considering ending it all on my upcoming birthday, which caused a little concern.
This gave us the idea of running a poll – how would you like me [...]

The John Cleese Nigerian Lottery

I’m very pleased to see that the truly excellent value John Cleese (that’s me) Nigerian Lottery is open for business.
Various things you need to know:

It’s not necessarily got anything to do with Nigeria
There is no gambling of any kind involved
You will receive emails from me and my minions
Some of these will include special offers [...]

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