Birthday Suicide Poll

Some of you have been enjoying banter with me on Twitter.

Never one to be overly concerned about convention or even taste, I recently mentioned that I was considering ending it all on my upcoming birthday, which caused a little concern.

This gave us the idea of running a poll – how would you like me to end it all? NB: results are advisory, not binding.

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20 Responses to Birthday Suicide Poll

  1. SlimG says:

    Please don’t, I’d miss you

  2. Sampanther says:

    I think option six is the best one, lol


  3. il128 says:

    When my time comes I’m going to do the same. Not sure about when that time is yet…

  4. kvnc1027 says:

    Now, what WOULD the world be like without John Cleese?
    I mean, haven’t lost enough geniuses to untimely checkouts? Additionally, my birthday is also on 10-27, and quite frankly I don’t want to know that we lost John on THAT DAY!!

  5. hydna1968 says:

    I really wouldnt bother yourself with such things yet, I’ve heard death is overrated!

  6. Lozzykinz says:


    Palin’s Travels.


  7. Pellegra Jean says:

    None of the above, John. You should definitely use a banana, or at least a killer raspberry.
    Really, hope you have many more birthdays to come, I’m a big fan of yours!

  8. brouhaha says:

    Other: Death by cantaloupe.

    I wish you’d write those long thoughtful blogs about firemen and London again. The videos are great (well, they’re okay) but long writings by Jack Cheese are just super.

  9. Flyingscotsman says:

    Haaayyyyyy! You can’t go! I haven’t talked or met you yet. But there was this one time when you were in Croatia and I was standing in line next to you for something. Of course my dumb dumb mind decided to not register you and just run along on stupid mode. Later I kinda had that usual “wasnt that John at the line?… Butex!”
    So yea if nothing else I would be much obliged if you could make it to Croatia one day for a show. Your humor just shaped my view to the world. Oh and if you must you can bring the whole Monty Phyton crew eh 😛
    Oh wait birthday thingy… Arm…
    How about taking a dump in a shrubbery! Yea that would work.

  10. billnoce says:

    DON’T YOU F****NG DARE! please.

  11. ArthurG says:

    Why would you end it all now when there are so many amazingly silly people in the world to make fun of?

  12. buffalo says:

    oh come on killing one self on birthdays is soooo 2008

  13. cyber_rigger says:

    For God’s sake, do a manly suicide.

    I vote for death by old age.

  14. chopit says:

    It would only be fitting for you to be chased off a cliff by dozens of hot topless girls.

  15. Matt Wilkins says:

    Sitting in front of a warm fire, whilst smoking a fine cigar and drinking a glass of Veuve Clicquot, just as a 16-ton weight falls from the sky.

  16. AZguy says:

    I’m glad that your dad didn’t saddle you with the name “Jack Cheese”. That might have turned you into a silly person.

    Does the BBC carry this show? This comedy troop has obviously watched all of your shows.

    Trevor is as tall as you are in every way, so the future is in good hands. He was standing in the background speaking out of the side of his mouth this time about how “that’s hardly a formation”.

    Keep your eye on this guy.

  17. IanW says:

    Very glad you’re still here with us John! But if you really wanted to commit suicide in the most hideously painful and disgusting manner possible, I would suggest getting remarried.

  18. Dear Mrs. Nesbit,

    It has come to my attention that you will be making an appearance here in San Diego later this month. My beautiful wife (a former Miss India contestant) and I would like to give you a historical tour of San Diego – both as a gift for your birthday and out of my appreciation for your contribution to comedy (and my own entertainment as a youth). My family has resided here since the Spanish expedition of 1769 that resulted in the founding of our fair city and the very birth of California! No one can give you the perspective of America’s Finest City that I can and provide for visiting friends and family. While I have a quarter-century history of digging on all things Pythonian, I can promise you that not only would you thoroughly enjoy seeing San Diego through my/our eyes, but that I would refrain from referring to you as Mrs. Nesbit in the future. I hope to hear from you soon, and a belated happy birthday! I can be contacted through the information in my bio…

  19. woodstock60 says:

    Well, your tooth fell out already,so I say keep dropping bits off and glueing them back on until you’re just one giant glue blob. Then we’ll simply roll you off with the lemurs.

  20. J.Curtis says:

    I voted for the Palin option but have changed my mind. No one should die so horribly.

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